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"He is 12 and that's all you need to know" ~ Micheal 2018

Davids true form
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David as a drop bear
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AliasesEdit

DJ Davie-D-what the heck am i doing here?

Fake Shoulda Boi

David "discount left twix" Duwaik

Abilities, Strengths, and Weaknesses Edit

David Duwaik was born on December 7, 1941

His stare makes even babies go silent. Women call him el gran raro. Men say he steals their girls on the daily( all rumors of such are unsubstantiated and generally thought of as false). He'll steal your girl( also a lie) and beat you in pub g( this may be true). He is also the best debater in the galaxy( false he was once beaten by a reflection). Trump says there are two problems in this world. Aliens and Davids charisma( he later changed this statement to be more racist and include more rapists). He's 18 and single( false he is 12 and always will be), but his heart belongs to Pedro(???). Ladies, get ready.( I wouldn't) The sexiest man whose name is (not david) is in town.(probably not) He would be the sexiest man alive, but no one can beat Pedro, because he's perfect( wut???). Even more perfect than David. His hair is more luscious than David's, and his intelligence is infinite (like David's love for him[this is getting weird].) He also holds a strong resemblance to a drop bear as seen in the photo of David above( nah) - where he can be seen baring his teeth(oh those are teeth i thought those were marshmallows), which is also his main defense mechanism. That would also be true but we all know that a David-Pedro Hybrid is truly the sexiest man alive( see also Ryan Reynolds). That should be the best part.

David is known to have an empty water bottle fetish( who wrote this, on second thought i don't want to know). Anything that crackles, will summon a David. Be careful, however, because if bread is not offered upon arrival, there will be unknown consequences(this is true).

On the whole pretty solid dude and this page was ridiculous.

Latest activityEdit

Davids true form

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